God is good. 2015, 2016 and forever.

Praise God for new glasses! Yay ^^

One thing I find really refreshing for my soul, is to stop, look back and reflect on all that has happened. Whether it be what happened today, last week, or this year. For me, this naturally takes the form of a spontaneous mix of doodles + words on a large piece of blank paper (lined paper is no banana. It limits my creativity man) 

As I mentally and physically drew my way through the year, I found nooks and crannies of the year that I had forgotten about, but were significant. For example I moved churches, moved houses, moved cities (back to Sydney), got a job, lived with my grandparents for the first time. and beneath the tangible changes (like what I just mentioned), were all the emotional highs and lows. 

Truth be told, I did not start this year in a happy chaps mental (or physical) state. In fact I was in a rather low low. I felt completely empty of motivation or courage. But one by one, piece by piece, by the grace of God through the love of my super-godly-amazing mum, God rebuilt me-this time he was going to build my house on a rock, and not sinking sand. 

It's absolutely amazing the journey of deliverance + transformation God has taken me on this year. If you ask me I would 100% LOVE to tell you about it. God is so good. So here's the challenge, if I could look back and testify that every single thing (whether seemingly 'good' or 'bad') actually was a good gift from God, will I-and will you-look ahead and praise God for his guaranteed goodness in 2016 starting now? On the very edge of the new year?

Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. (James 1:17) 

And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.  (Romans 8:28) 

Praise the LORD. Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever. (Psalm 106:1)

We belong in the body

As wonderful as it is to serve alongside my brothers and sisters in Christ in ministry, sometimes it only heightens my awareness of how different I am. How the way I see the world, think and function is just different, or abnormal. Sometimes I feel like I'm in a whole other world from everyone else, let alone not on the same page. While uniqueness really should be celebrated, often it feels isolating when I start to look sideways.

God showed me that satan had been whispering lies into my heart...
I don't belong in the body...
I'm out of place, out of context...
The body seems to function fine without me...

But God comforted me with some verses from 1 Corinthians 12:

Now if the foot should say, “Because I am not a hand, I do not belong to the body,” it would not for that reason stop being part of the body. If the whole body were an eye, where would the sense of hearing be? But in fact God has placed the parts in the body, every one of them, just as he wanted them to be. If they were all one part, where would the body be? As it is, there are many parts, but one body.The eye cannot say to the hand, “I don’t need you!”

I can trust in Gods design because it is good, and he has placed me exactly where I need to be with the right gifts for me to use to serve others. I am so thankful that in the body, every part is equally valued in the eyes of our creator and plays its significant part...even me. :)

 Thankful for time with Dad + Sis around Christmas

Above all

Recently in a sermon, I was reminded of the importance of thanksgiving in prayer-are there corners in my life that I fail to bring to God in prayer? Especially in thanksgiving? I decided to do a mind map of all the main areas of my life I could give thanks to God for:

This morning however, I was reminded of how we are to take up our cross daily, and offer our bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to the Lord as our spiritual act of worship. I looked across my mind map again and asked myself: am I willing to surrender all these things for the sake of following Christ? Would I say with Paul,

But whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. What is more, I consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake I have lost all things. I consider them garbage, that I may gain Christ and be found in him... 

I want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead.

(Philippians 3:7-11)

How much do I long to "simply" know Christ? Would I consider every other blessing in my life a loss compared to this surpassing greatness? How often do our blessings become a distraction rather than a good gift from God increasing our worship of the giver-when we fail to love him above it all?

I put a rectangle around the blessing on my mind map that could never ever be taken away from me. That is-the love of God and my relationship with Him. May I surrender all other things into his hands, that I may follow and gain Christ.

#lifeofanintrovert

There are (quiet) riches found in words that have been thoughtfully formulated and expressed in what has been written that is waiting to be discovered…by everyone? Introverts-I am talking to you. While extroverts are busy going out and socialising and doing what extroverts do, we (introverts) may find we have a different calling.

Maybe it’s to travel back in time and listen to the written wisdom of saints of old (I am talking about reading), or to meditate on melodies until a new song pours forth from our soul, or to gaze upon the beauty of the earth and create: a picture, a story, a poem, a video, to capture the glimpses of glory to share with the world.

We may read. We may write. We may reflect and create. Whatever it is, pursue that inner calling-for this is how you were meant to experience and respond to the presence of God in this world. 

The first and second of February

The first:
Jesus you've completely changed my life. Since knowing you, you have turned my world completely upside down. I've spent most of my life without you and not knowing you, there are still so many things I need to learn. I feel the burden of not being raised in a Christian family. My thinking and heart have been warped and darkened by sin for so long. Your words and way of life are so foreign to me sometimes, even if I really want to follow, there are lies and tangles of sin deep in me that draw me back from you. Lord I don't know what to do, I can't even cling to myself because so many things about me are simply slipping. Help me to cling to you, the rock eternal. But you can make all things new. From my heart make me your new creation, created to be like Christ in true righteousness and holiness. 

The second:
I want to, but I simply cannot pretend that nothing happened. I cannot just slip back into things here and carry on business as usual. I just don't feel comfortable here anymore. I don't see things the way I used to. The people I loved are but an echo now. I can't go back. And I just want to stop and be still, but I'll need to move one day, otherwise I'll just float here in limbo unable to let go of the past and embrace the wonderful future God has in store for me. Why do I find it so hard to trust my Heavenly Father? Why do I struggle to believe that He is always good? Why do I think that he is not generous, loving or willing enough to shower me with blessing. I've told myself that he desires my hurt as an end in itself rather than the means to greater blessings.